This Friday is like no other on Long Island. It is the weekend for the official kick off to summer. Back when I was single, kid free and crazy I would patiently wait all year long for this Friday. I would be giddy with excitement from the moment I woke up.

My friends and I would have the house in the Hamptons lined up. We would be making plans to see what bars we would “hit” and what cute outfits we were going to wear.

Friday night would be spent at our friend’s house in the Hampton’s.
Saturday night would be spent at local spots like Casey’s or Beach Bar.
Sunday was the slop mess of the Boardy Barn.

Ask me how I feel about this Friday now?

Frustration.  Why?

Well, because as of today every Friday until Labor Day will be a traffic nightmare when I get out of work at 4:30 pm. All the single, kid free crazy “kids” will be packing up and hoping in their car with the intentions of getting on the road by 3:00 pm. The very popular Hamptons Jitney bus line will be adding extra fleet to drag the NYC “kids” out to the east end of Long Island for fun in the sun.

What I am saying is that traffic is a mess. A big fat mess. And what kills me is that I can drive 58 in a 55mph zone and get pulled over for speeding. But Mr. Wonder Gel and his fake Prada sunglasses can be driving on the shoulder at 89 mph, on his cell phone, with NO headset, texting to Miss Fake & Bake next to him and not get a ticket.

So, every Friday from now until Labor Day I will sit in a ridiculous amount of traffic. To entertain myself I pretend I am Sabrina the Teenage Middle age Witch. I have secret powers that can magically wish for quicksand traps on the road so that when Mr. Wonder Gel and Miss Fake & Bake drive by in the shoulder at 89 mph they are sadly met by a dirt nap.

My next blog post will be about, how to correctly fill out your AARP form since apparently I am old and have this post to prove it.

PS. Happy Memorial Day to all!