Entries in Birthday Party (4)
Lessoned Learned
There are many lessons along the way of the journey that is parenting. I have passed many lessons the first time through, others I have had to repeat over and over before the lesson stuck.
At my house this weekend there was around 35 adults and 25 kids. Why the insanity? Because my baby boy turned one.
Now ask me if I will do it again? Go on...
NO. A big fat no.
Truth be told I did not want to have a big party but my Mom guilt ate me alive. I did the big party for my first born, how could I not do it for my second? I should have talked myself out of it. But I didn't, that Mom guilt kills me sometimes.
It took a full week to prepare for the party. There was food to be ordered, beverages to be iced, favors to be made, and cleaning. NON-stop cleaning. And then on top of it, Long Island was in the middle of 100 degree heat wave.
I saw smiles from the kids and socializing from the adults. And every stitch of food and alcohol was consumed. Party Success!
Let's circle back to the glaring lesson. I was able to enjoy all of 45 minutes of a party that lasted nine hours. And those 45 minutes were at the end of the night after my son went to bed. During the height of the party I did not get to sit with any of my friends for longer than three minutes.
Just recently the classiest of all bloggers did a post called Honestly, I am not a party pooper. She shared how she struggled with throwing parties for her children. This post hit home quickly when I read it because I had already made the decision when I sent out the invitations that this was going to be my last "big" party.
I need to be that drastic. Outside of the huge expense the party was, outside of the week it took me to prepare for the party, it was the fact that I did not spend anytime with the people I love to be around including my kids. In the future I plan to stick to the intimate backyard bbq's for get togethers with friends and keep the kids birthdays to just Mommy, Daddy, and kids.
I want to create unique and special memories for my boys. There will be a time when my boys will not want to spend their birthday's with me because they will want to celebrate with their friends. I can't waste one more birthday because of Mom guilt. Because this Mom can see that time passes too quickly.
Lessoned learned.
Kim
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Wordless Wednesday - Double Dose
Man am I old!
Need to see a man about a horse
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A Mommy Blessing- May 26 2007
It took us eight months to conceive you. I will never forget the moment on September 20th 2006 when I took my monthly pregnancy test and it actually reflected a positive result. I stood in the bathroom and cried with joy.
When I was five months pregnant with you the doctors told us we were having a little girl. I immediately went home and gave every piece of boy clothing away to charity. My mother was beyond ecstatic because you were going to be the first granddaughter she could spoil. You see you did not know at the time but she has six grandsons and no daughters. How quickly that all changed!
You had other plans about your sex. It was my 32 week sonogram appointment and I will never forget the conversation with the nurse. I asked the nurse, can you just double check that she is still a she. She said without hesitation, “who said you were having a girl, because you are clearly having a boy”. My mother was at this appointment with me and we both went into a hysterical laughing fit. It was clear she was not getting her first granddaughter.
I found it odd that on this appointment that I kept getting transferred from one room to the next. And then the whispering amongst the nurses was odd but I kept cool because my mom was with me. But then, my little man, I was not prepared for what the sonogram specialist was going to tell me next.
Hydrocephalus. There was a chance you would be born with hydrocephalus. I tried to have a stiff upper lip because the doctor was being so kind, and gentle with how he delivered the news, and again my mom was with me so I did not want her to freak out, watching me freak out. I don’t remember walking to the car, but I remember closing the door and just sobbing. Sobbing so hard that I could not talk. Sobbing so hard that I could not breath. Not only was I going to have to tell your daddy that we are no longer having “Daddy’s little girl“, but that there was the possibility of our baby being born with a handicap. Your daddy was much stronger than I was because he filled me with hope, he hugged me and told me what I needed to hear.
In reality, you were loved by us already and no matter what we were going to love you. I had to wait four long weeks before we could go for another sonogram. On my 36 week appointment, your daddy and I received news that it appeared that the condition was clearing up and there was a strong possibility that you would be fine.
Prayer works. I strongly believe that.
On May 25th I was induced. You were big and you were a week shy from your due date and our doctor said if we waited any longer I may not be able to give birth naturally.
On May 26th, 2007 god allowed me to become a mother to another one of his beautiful angels. My Aaron angel. Your birth was like something out of the movies. I was in hard labor for only 11 minutes. You were in a rush to meet us the doctors said. Hearing you cry for the first time was 
magical. Having the doctors tell daddy and me that you were 100% healthy made us both cry.
Thank you for choosing me as your mother Aaron. Thank you for showing me just how wonderful motherhood can be because as I told you I had a rough time with your brother. As I write this I still cannot believe that you are now a one year old. Each day your curiosity grows about the 
world.
You are a dare devil. You love to see “what if” even after mommy has said no, no, no to you. Your smile is healing. Your giggle is infectious. You idolize your older brother. It is adorable how you try to imitate him. You and your brother take my breath away sometimes when I see the both of you playing together. 
How did I get so lucky?
Even when you wake up at 2:00 am for a bottle I still pick you up out of your crib so that I can hold the bottle for you. We both know you are quite capable of holding your bottle on your own, but I still love our quiet time together. That is our time that it is just me and you. Our time where I can brush your hair with my hand and kiss your forehead. Our time that you will still wrap your fingers around my index finger. And as I saw when your brother was so tiny this time will come to an end soon enough. I am not ready to let go yet.
There is such a big world out ahead of you my little man. I promise to encourage your dreams, keep you safe and to love you to pieces.
Happy First Birthday Aaron James. I could not be more blessed than to have you call me mommy.
Birthday Parties - Stay or Go?
On the phone the other day with a friend I had a conversation about my three year olds social calendar. Yep, at three he has entered into the phase of "The birthday parties". My three year is invited to every birthday for every kid in his day care class. When he got his first one last year I was so excited, his first little outing that was not "Mommy's friends". Then two weeks later I broke my ankle so he could not make it. While in my cast he was invited to another 4 birthday parties but had to miss them all.
It is upon us again. That time of the year when I have been getting invitations in the mail almost daily for my three year old to attend another one of his "buddies" in day care.
While it is sweet, these parties are sucking away taking away four glorious weekends. Well not the entire weekend, but you get the point.
My friend made me laugh though after making a great point. Well, first I should preface that me and my friend are closing in on 36 this year.. born in good ol' 1972.. making us old seasoned. Back to the point; she said "when was it when parents started going to these birthday parties?"
Whoa. I did my best Joey Lawrence impression from Blossom. I can look back at any of my birthday parties growing up and see only kids. None of the parents were ever there with their kids. They dropped off their kids and ran. They were free for three to four hours.
Now? If you have a child between the ages of 3-8, heck even 9; you are stoned if you drop your kid off to a party and then leave. Well maybe not stoned, but you get the idea. Parents apparently look down on other parents that drop and go. I never knew that. Did you?
When did that crossover happen? I get that we live in a scary world and you can't trust anyone. Which sucks. But, can you sit back and laugh, sigh and remember how simple birthday parties were back in the day. It was not about the hot new place to host birthday parties for $49.99 per child. It was about red rover in the front yard. Or hide and seek in the basement. It was about a BBQ or pizza and not 30 catered trays from the local French restaurant.
Sigh.
Well this weekend kicks off my summer tour with my three year old. I will spit shine his hair. Make him use his big boy manners and hang out with the other parents leaning against the wall like dorks in junior high while he jumps around in the newest indoor jump house.