Take Big Deep Breaths & Wait
About six days ago my oldest son Donnie started a very noticeable eye tic. Actually it is best described as excessively blinking tied with a very irregular pattern. At first I thought he was just tired. Rest did not correct it. I waited. I removed all processed sugar from his diet for two days. I waited. I allowed a significant amount of time for the tic to correct itself before I called the doctor. It never did.
To my surprise they scheduled an appointment for Donnie to be seen immediately. The nurse on the phone actually told me "oh it could be nothing or it could be the start of Tourette's". I hung up and cried. Cried not only because I felt defeated that if he does has something wrong I would never be able to kiss it and make it better. I cried because the nurse on the phone had no authority to throw a term like that around without an evaluation.
I was numb by the time we got to the office. His pediatrician did a very basic physical. There was even a slight attempt to make him do some balancing acts with his eyes closed that he tried to perform but it was really above any three year olds capability. I waited. I was looking at every expression on her face. What did that mean? Why is she doing this?
My mind was racing. Luckily my husband was able to join me at this appointment. He is my rock. My sanity. He steps in when my emotions paralyze me.
The doctor did not give us much to go on except we should not speculate anything and assume everything is okay at this point. I did not even mention the moronic nurse I spoke to earlier, I couldn't. I did not want my son to see me cry when he was just sitting on the table being an amazing little super hero. The doctor tells us that this could be temporary. She then handed me two referrals for additional testing. 
Donnie now has appointments to see an ophthalmologist to be followed up with a neurologist. The ophthalmologist appointment is next Wednesday. The neurologist is April 15th. April 15th. Do you know how far away April 15th is when all you want to do is make sure everything is okay with your child.
The only advice she passed along to us was "do not talk about it to him", which I already knew from the little reading I did online regarding eye tics. I will not even Google Tourettes. Mentally I am not ready to submit to anything other than my faith that everything is fine and this is just a blip in his life.
In the mean time I am going to be very unconventional and visit a homeopathic center to have Donnie's mouth swabbed. From what I am told from a person I trust completely, they will be able to see if there are any imbalances in chemicals in his little system. I mean in all honesty, how the hell do I not know if there is some toy he plays with daily that is layered in lead? With all the recalls I get daily what if they missed something?
My mind races with thoughts like that constantly. It could be something as simple as he is allergic to our new puppy. Until I know what "it" is my thoughts run wild with possibilities.
That is just how I am wired. I know no other way than to internalize and over analyze things. Though, you would never know looking at me because I throw on my smile and move forward. Breathing.
There is nothing left to do but wait.
Kim
**I contacted the pediatricians office and reported the nurse. I did not ask that she lose her job or anything, just to use a little common sense. Also, I did not mention that all of Donnie's motor skills are fine, outside of the tic. The only glaring difference are his temper tantrums have gotten worse and it is harder to pull him out of them, but that is probably just the age. Oh, and eye drops.. I tried to use eye drops thinking that he could have dry eyes.. but that has not worked either. I will post when I know more about what is going on. Thank you internet for the wonderful prayers and wishes!!
38 Comments
Reader Comments (38)
First, that nurse seriously needs to be fired. Please let that office administrator or the doctor know how unprofessional she was once you can talk calmly about it.
More importantly, I do hope you get good news about Donnie. I will send up some prayers for him and your family. What a stressful thing. Sounds like you are doing the right things by not researching things online and by seeking other reasons for the blinking.
I know the Wait and See can be excruciating. Stay strong!!
Positive energy headed south over the Sound. Sometimes being a parent isn't very fair. Hope all turns out well. Maybe call the Neurologist every week or so see if anything opens up.
Thank you for sharing that. Kids his age go little problems...He very easily could just grow through this.
The Docs are right about bringing it up in front of him...also, if he sees you stressing, it might get him stressed which wouldn't help him. As your husband is your rock, be Donnie's rock..
I'm in your cheering section (except I'm not wearing the skirt)...so hang in there and let us know what happens over the week.
Hugs <<Kim>>
Oh Kim!
It is so excruciating when something like this happens. Know that we're hoping for the best (as comforting as strangers on your computer screen can be...) and that it will turn out to be nothing. Prayers, hugs and white light.
i agree with pg...call the neurologists office but, leave instructions that, if something opens up earlier, even if it's last minute, to call you!!
in the meantime, breathe...and the homeopathic doctor isn't a bad idea, either...although, you have to be careful because, sometimes they are just in it to sell you a bunch of homeopathic medicine. but, after my mom had her heart attack, she saw a homeopathic doctor, along with her cardiologist and, it seemed to make a difference, back then!!!
now, she's just crazy but, that's a completely different story!!!
xoxo
I agree that I would call the neurologist and ask to be put on a list to see if something opens up sooner. I'm sure they get cancellations often, since the wait is so long.
Also, I don't know if it is a pediatric neurologist you're going to see, or even if there is such a thing, but I can give you the number of the guy Eric saw a few months ago. He is a family friend of his parents and I'm sure strings can be pulled for you and your little guy! I will do whatever I can to help out and put your mind at ease sooner :o}
In the meantime...I really have nothing to stand on saying this, at least not my own experiences, but since just about everyone of my friends is a Mommy I know it's the hardest job of all- the one that never ends. So I can understand your concern and heaartaches wawnting to know he's ok! Know that he'll always be perfect in my eyes, no matter what stories I hear about him...hehehehe :o}
Looking forward to lunch today!
I would stalk that dr.'s office and beg them to get me in earlier. I think that sounds like a long time to wait. I am so sorry for you...You are in my thoughts xoxoxoxo
You SHOULD NOT have to wait that long. For your own sanity, you need to see someone now. I really hope that things are okay with your beautiful son. I am just like you, my mind would race and I would be worried until I knew everything was fine. Why doesn't the medical field understand that? I'll be keeping you and your family in my thoughts. I think you are smart to go to another doctor that you trust, and I agree that it could just be a very, very small thing. I hope it resolves soon.
What a beautiful little boy! I just said a prayer for your family. I am not the least bit surprised to find you would be doing everything you can to explore all possibilities (as with the homeopathic option). Of course you are! And April 15 does seem like ages but a lot can happen between now and then - like Donnie's tic disappearing as quickly as it appeared.
I'm sending you such a strong hug.
Oh Kim - how very stressful for you! What a terrible thing for that nurse to do - what was she thinking? I wrote about this in November (tears fears and gratitude) but I spend the first few months of Graham's life having him tested for what "could be" a severe disability because his head was so misshapen. It was soooo hard but it did turn out to be nothing. It will probably be nothing for you as well but I remember looking at the date for his final evaluation and thinking "how can I possibly keep breathing between now and then?" HUGS.
I completely understand how stressful this is for you. I am having similar fears about my youngest not being "normal" (she's showing some signs of autism). It's stressful, and difficult to deal with, and it makes your heart ache for your child. I sincerely hope this story has a happy ending. ((hugs))
Oh boy, Kim. We will certainly be breathing and waiting right along with you while thinking nothing but good thoughts!
Oh Kim, I am so sorry you are going through this scare. Hopefully it is nothing. But I know as a mother, you can't help but worry & try to prepare for the worst. I definitely think it was wrong for that nurse to frighten you with Tourettes! Hopefully she will use better judgement in the future. You & your little guy (and your family) are in our thoughts & prayers. Please keep us all posted!
Hugs!!!!
Oh Kim.
I called my doctor when my youngest was 2 weeks old because she had a strange TICK when she slept. We were in the hospital, pedi neurology, for 7 whole days. The worst in my life.
I know what you are feeling. I held my daughter and prayed that everything would be okay. It was a terrible time in my life. My advice: breath, pray, and enjoy... everything will be okay.
If it was something super duper important ... they would have sent you to the hospital IMMEDIATELY like they did for us.
I know what you are going through. Hang in there. In the meantime, call another neurologist. You will need mroe than one opinion anyhow. yes?
((Hugs)) email me classychaos@gmail.com with any questions... we know more then the average parents about children's neurology experiences. ((hugs))
Egads! What bad manners she had. My daughter got facial tics after using a 'new' ADHD drug. The doctor acted as if it was 'no big deal' and I stopped letting her see him. Your gut will lead you in the right direction.
God Bless you and your family.
I hope all works out for your little super hero and I hope that it is just a blip in his life like you hope.
Don't worry yourself sick and certainly call that neurologists office every day if you have to; to get your son in there as soon as possible!
Take Care
LJ
oh my heavens, parenting is the greatest blessing but such a test of our deepest strengths. I'm going to send you prayers, good thoughts and a little extra strength I have on reserve for a rainy day
in the meantime I would give a solid effort on getting that appt moved up. if not an option I would let it go, take a deep breath and stay busy, strong and positive. when/if you're ready I have a great tale about my friend's homeopathic journey with her son. big victory just by removing gluten
sending you the BEST thoughts I have to share....
If I were you and was told that my son could have something possibly serious, I would call my ped and ask them to talk to the neurologist. There is no reason that you should wait 2 months to get answers.
Good luck
Stay positive until there is a reason not to. I'm one to go right to the worst case scenerio, and it's a very bad habit. Don't Google anything!!! about this. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Mommie
http://www.mommieshome.net
Saying a prayer for your little boy. Have faith and think positive,that means a lot!
I'm so glad you called the office about that incident! Do you feel better that you did that?
Have a wonderful night!
The wench definitely needed to be reported. I'll hold a good thought for your son, and for you.
The waiting and not knowing must certainly be hard psychologically. I don't know what else to say except stay strong and may everything turn out well for you & your son.
Slipping out of my alter ego for this one...
Kim, I wish you and your family the best. I can't say I know how you feel, but I can sure as hell imagine it. Vividly. I'm so relieved that it's "so far so good" and I have faith that it will continue to be that way. Love from my household to yours.
If it's any consolation, my son started doing the same thing about a month ago, and it lasted for about 2 weeks. We even videotaped it in case the pediatrician wanted to see it when it happened. It has since gone away, so maybe it was just a case of dry eyes. Here's to hoping that it's nothing but that in my case and yours. Hugs! Hang in there!
I wanted to make a suggestion: Eliminate all dyes from his diet, whatsoever. I have a friend whose son began ticking like that (he was older, though), and she eliminated sugar. It was only when she eliminated dyes that she noticed an alleviation of the blinking. Worth a shot.
The nurse. Don't even let me get started on her.
You are a good mom, no matter what. Never believe otherwise.
((HUGS)) ++thought++ ~~prayers~~
Kim-
I am just checking in and was sorry to hear about what is going on. I have a good friend who is also my Dr. I had a very honest talk with her about how frustrated I was with getting timely care for me and my son at her practice just last week. She says it is a real problem and the best thing to do is to hound that specialist's office for any openings. People answering the phones and doing the scheduling are not always the advocate that you need in these types of situations. My best to you - you are also in my thoughts and prayers...
I can't imagine how you must be feeling right now.
Just know that you & your family are in my thoughts & prayers!
Kim- Just wanted to know that you are in my prayers....Chanin
It seems really out of control that she would mention such a severe condition to you over the phone and related to a single symptom she hadn't seen!! Jeesh!