Jogging In Circles

Mother's Day.  Is there really such a day where a mom is given a true break?  Nah.  Not in my house.  And it is not for the lack of the hubby's effort.  See, I have some sort of curse over my head.  Truly I believe this.  Why?  Because each year for the past THREE years I have been in the doctors office on Mother's Day.  I am not even kidding.  Every Mother's Day morning my oldest wakes up with a ridiculously high fever.  Turns out he has the same virus my younger son had a couple of days earlier. 

The virus is not my friend.  If I could see this virus I would kick its ass.  BAD.  I have not had a full night sleep in over ten days because of this life sucking virus that keeps the kids up.  So, instead of kicking up my feet today and resting my poor tired eyes I have been consoling my very unconformable little boy.  But then I sit back and realize hey, what better day to be a mom and put all my super mommy abilities to work?

Folks, I say this to keep me sane.  :)

I hope all you moms were able to enjoy today.  (ps.  I am sorry that I was not able to visit anyone's blog this weekend, it was just a little crazy in my house.  I will catch up over the week!!)

Here are some of my favorite shots of the week.  :)

BUSTED!  My Toilet Paper Thief

Air Hockey Champ in Training

Improvising Teething Rings

I suck as a BFF. See yesterday was my BFF 36th birthday and I meant to get this post up yesterday, BUT, I had a sick child that needed to be picked up from work and taken to the doctors. Excuses, excuses.

Now my BFF and I have known each other for 28 years. We met in third grade. I was kicked out the classroom for talking. She was kicked out shortly after for the same. Our punishment was to sit outside the classroom door (that was closed) on opposite sides. Luckily one of us had a couple of pennies and we played shove a penny football. Our friendship grew from that day.

Jennifer is one of those girls women that puts her opinion and thoughts out there for the world to see. She is intelligent, strong willed, and determined. Here are 13 reasons I love her and some of our memories rolled into it all.

1. She came to every one of my birthday parties growing up. She is the one in the hat, I am in the one in the super hot black and white suit WITHOUT the boobs and I am in pain from sliding across the cement during red rover. The back of my arms and head were bleeding. I am awesome. Jenn was awesome for helping me hide from my mom that said not to play that game on the cement.




2. Yep, we were cheerleaders. Rock, steady, because our team is getting ready. I know this picture is a little small (to hide the HUGE part down the middle of my head and the blinding metal braces I wore for four years). But in this picture Jenn has perfect hair. She has always had perfect hair. HOWEVER, her perfect hair took ONE hour to dry from start to finish. She has extremely curly hair that she would blow out straight every other day. Do you know how long an hour is to a friend waiting to tell her BFF nothing. HA. And she had the best smelling hair. You would walk past her and still smell the conditioner (Pert). Where is my hair always smelt like dirty perm.

3. Around age 11 I slept over her house. We decided it would be hysterical to toast marshmallows over citronella candles and throw them at cars as they drove by her house. She or I (I forget now who it was) nailed a car. With the car window down. WHAP right on the side of a laides face. She screeched and turned around and ratted us out to her parents. She didn't even get punished. My mom on the other hand punished me for a year I think.

4. The first time I ever cut out of school was with Jenn. Walking home from the high school in 11th grade in the pouring rain. Who passes us by? Her mom. She drags us to her house and calls my mom. Jenn did not get punished. I on the other hand got punished for a year and a half I think.

5. Before we were 21 we had fake id that lied and said we were 21. She had the best ID ever, I had a fake id that said I was 5'4". Have I mentioned to you folks that I am 5'11"? Anyway, we got in regardless. We never drank alcohol. We would get waters with cherries. Lots and lots of cherries. Jenn and I would dance the night away. I can remember many a nights with the entire dance floor circled around us why we did our gay little dance routine.

6. We lived together in a tiny apartment for a short period of time. While living together I was sleeping on the couch and her hairless scary cat decided I was the toilet. It shit and threw up all over me. I did not realize it until the morning. We still can laugh about it to this day. Damn rat cat.

7. Then she left me to get married. She actually met him at a club while we were celebrating my 20th. We got into the biggest fight we have ever had because of it. I felt like I had just been flat left. I was immature and apologized many years later for being such a tool to her. Still to this day it was my first broken heart.

8. Not only did she leave me but she went off and had the cutest baby girl a year later. And then she done and did it to me. She moved to Tennessee for what felt like an eternity. Visiting her in TN was a top ten vacation. We drank beer on her porch and laughed for four days straight.

9. When she would come home for visits we would get to hang out. I will still never forget the look on her face when I said I was taking her line dancing. Here she was visiting from TN where she said she could not get away from it, and I dragged her to the best honkey tonk bar on Long Island. For the record all, I love that crap. Line dancing rules.

10. Jenn is a complete dork. Just like me. BUT Jenn is a complete movie slaker. Say a quote from any main stream movie that has a legendary line associated with it and she is clueless. I know everyone else in the world would know when I quote "Um, yeah, you need a cover letter for your TPS report".. she would look at me like I had 47 heads.

11. Thank god she moved back to NY so she could make me take a picture with her wearing my beautiful bridal shower hat. What are BFF for if not to make you look incredibly silly so that you look hot right?








12. Jenn is a mother of two. She has a beautiful, smart, completely adjusted teenager girl and a sprouting little man who is the apple of her eye. Her children are so respectful, polite and have Jenn's straight forward sharp as a tack personalities. She has so much to be proud of in her two kids.

13. (my fav pic of all time of her taken the morning of my wedding - she was one of the bridesmaids) And last but not least at all. I do not get to see Jenn everyday. Or every month. Hell we have gone years sometimes without seeing each other. But our friendship can be picked up at whatever point or state we leave it. I value her opinion. She makes me see the other side of situations where I would have tunnel vision. Jenn challenges me with her conversations. And I am never afraid to share my views of politics, religion or basically anything really. She accepts me for who I am and what I think as I do her. We have seen and traveled many roads over the last 28 years. I am blessed to have such a wonderful, opinionated, straight forward, loving friend in my life. I never have to fear that she has an ulterior motive when speaking from her gut to me. She never has to worry about me sugar coating anything just so she can hear what she wants to hear. We are honest, brutal and sometimes overbearing to one another. But you know what? I love her heart and soul.

Happy Birthday My MUCH OLDER BFF.
(I should mention that Jenn is exactly 91 days older. Older means older. just like a win means win right?)

**Shot was taken at night- Really foggy full moon night last month.

On the phone the other day with a friend I had a conversation about my three year olds social calendar.  Yep, at three he has entered into the phase of "The birthday parties".  My three year is invited to every birthday for every kid in his day care class.  When he got his first one last year I was so excited, his first little outing that was not "Mommy's friends".  Then two weeks later I broke my ankle so he could not make it. While in my cast he was invited to another 4 birthday parties but had to miss them all.

It is upon us again.  That time of the year when I have been getting invitations in the mail almost daily for my three year old to attend another one of his "buddies" in day care.

While it is sweet, these parties are sucking away taking away four glorious weekends.  Well not the entire weekend, but you get the point. 

My friend made me laugh though after making a great point.  Well, first I should preface that me and my friend are closing in on 36 this year.. born in good ol' 1972.. making us old seasoned.   Back to the point; she said "when was it when parents started going to these birthday parties?"

Whoa.  I did my best Joey Lawrence impression from Blossom.  I can look back at any of my birthday parties growing up and see only kids.  None of the parents were ever there with their kids.  They dropped off their kids and ran.  They were free for three to four hours. 

Now?  If you have a child between the ages of 3-8, heck even 9; you are stoned if you drop your kid off to a party and then leave.  Well maybe not stoned, but you get the idea.  Parents apparently look down on other parents that drop and go.  I never knew that.  Did you? 

When did that crossover happen? I get that we live in a scary world and you can't trust anyone.  Which sucks.  But, can you sit back and laugh, sigh and remember how simple birthday parties were back in the day.  It was not about the hot new place to host birthday parties for $49.99 per child.  It was about red rover in the front yard.  Or hide and seek in the basement.  It was about a BBQ or pizza and not 30 catered trays from the local French restaurant.

Sigh.  

Well this weekend kicks off my summer tour with my three year old.  I will spit shine his hair.  Make him use his big boy manners and hang out with the other parents leaning against the wall like dorks in junior high while he jumps around in the newest indoor jump house. 

Soulful Smile

Baby Boy

First Big Boy Hair Cut

First Bloom

Today is the last day of the series What Moms Really Think. The focus today is What Moms think about good Dads.  It has been an awesome experience to be apart of the panel.  Thanks again to Jeremy, Piper, Mr. Lady, Lori and Huckdoll.  

In case you missed the five part series here is a run down of what we discussed:

Monday: What Moms really think about marriage

Tuesday: What Moms really think about physical appearance

Wednesday: What Moms really think about Sex

Thursday: What Moms really think about - Pet Peeves

Friday: What Moms think about good Dads

If you have some time, take a moment and pop on over.  It was a great series and the comments were just as interesting as the topics discussed.

:)

I had a ton of fun with a Thursday 13 I did a couple of months ago to see how people found my little spot on the WWW. I decided to see if the keyword searchers were any weirder different. The answer was yes, and it appears I attract alot of searches on poop.

1. Boobs jogging- Okay I have mentioned this before I am a double NEGATIVE A.. You will not find boobs here.
2. Bowel movements when jogging- You should search for Depends or something no?
3. Buttussy- I seriously think me and my girlfriend made up this nasty word. Could it be I am starting a trend like that's hot?
4. Cravings before pooping- WTF? HUH? WHAT? Could you imagine scenario "I NEED to have some Munchos right now.. I totally know I am going to shit soon." HUH?
5. Family kids peeing together sharing toilet picture- Drive to the nearest police station, or go to the next filming of how to catch a predator.. You need help. Please stay away. Peace weirdo.
6. Free photos of poop in toliet- Why would someone want this? Gross
7. Fucky mom- My Pimp found me.. damn.
8. Geritol coupons- How do I go from fucky mom to geritol coupons?
9. Just found out my hubbys been with a tranny- Call 1-800-Jerry Springer. Quickly.
10. Jogging hurts my balls- To all my guys readers.. any advice for this guy?
11. Kim is my mommy- Okay I will admit I had to do a search on this myself when I saw the keyword in my report. Why someone would type this I don't know. It sounds a little dominatrix like to me but - hey I was the second natural search result.wahhoo "what's my name? eat my shoe.. that is Mrs. Kim Mommy to you..
12. Jogging during breastfeeding- OUCH. that would be some support bra that you would have to buy to keep your kid on your boob while jogging.
13. Poo plops into the toilet- Oprah's Dr. Oz suggest that your poop should not plop but rather snake like into the toilet. Hope that helps.

As you can see I get a little crazy with why I think people use seach colorful keywords.. but it makes me giggle and hopefully you too.. Love me some Google Analytics!

On occasion when Donnie is fresh at school I have made him go home and make a card for his teachers to say I am sorry.  He usually just draws pictures and I write in it what he wants to say and then we bring it in the next day.

On occasion I pick up $5 gift cards to Starbucks and give them to their teachers just because I know they are not getting a fraction of the mortgage payment I pay to the daycare every month.

On birthday's or during the Christmas holiday I make it a point to make cards for the teachers with a lengthy note in it saying how much I value and appreciate them caring for my children while I have to work.

It means so much that I can trust the teachers in my sons daycare.  You can see that they generally care for my kids.  It shows in their sweet faces.  I hear it in my sons stories he tells me.  Or the new songs he sings.  

I have a relationship with these teachers. We have our five to ten minute chats everyday just to shoot the shit.  I care about them and their family and it is fun to watch Donnie in his environment.

Today when dropping Donnie off to his classroom I asked my his teacher "how is your daughter feeling?" (she recently had her tonsils taken out).  She went into telling me how she was feeling and then I rushed off to work.

My phone rang while driving into work and I noticed it was the daycare.  I of course panic, are the kids sick?  did one of the boys hurt themselves?

Nope. 

It was Donnie's teacher to thank me.  She went on to say how much she appreciated me taking time out of my day to ask about her and especially her daughter.  She said that some of her co-workers did not even ask how her daughter was doing and how hurt she was by that.  She wanted to thank me for always taking the time out to acknowledge that the staff are not just that.. they are mothers and women too. 

And then she said something that touched me, "Your really a great mom that is involved in your sons life. You go out of your way to make others feel appreciated and loved and it shows not only through you but through your son.  He is a little mirror image of you."

I sit here with tears in my eyes and a goofy smile while I type this post because it felt good.  It still feels good. 

Why?

Because she said I was doing a great job parenting when there are days I feel (and know) I suck at it.  

She did not have to take the time out of her day to call me and thank me, but she did.  And I am thankful for it because validation is not something you get all the time.  So when you do.. it can't help but feel good.

I have been in a funk.  Watching my mom struggle again with her health quickly reminds me how life is short and how quickly you become consumed with stress and negativity.  The passed couple of days I have been a bitch.  Yep I have.  I get really cranky that my mothers doctor's are educated quessers sometimes.. I am pissed off beyond belief at my middle sister.  I hate that we are in a war.  I get freaked out by the craziness of the world.  I could go on and on. 

But tonight after reading some books to my three year old Donnie, we had one of the sweetest conversation about getting married.

"Mommy, I missed you today at school"

"I missed you too peanut"

"Mommy your the boss, you have the piggy pops, the belly, the stinky hiney" (my husband and I have little bidding wars all the time on who gets the toes to kiss, the belly to zerbert and the hiney to squeeze)

"Awh thanks handsome"

"Mommy your so sweet, will you marry me?"

"Honey, Mommy can't marry you because your my little boy"

"But I will grow up to be big and strong like daddy and go poo poo on the potty like daddy, maybe when I get older?"

"No peanut, you can't marry mommy, but mommy loves you"

"I love you too mommy, your the best mommy in the world"

Yeah, so my self pity party is over.  He was my restart button to reboot.  He really is a superhero.